Why adults date other marrieds?
Talk about a loaded topic that no one wants to talk about, that’s it. Funny thing, extramarital affairs have been going on since ancient times. Extramarital relationships can be fraught with troubles, cause misery, and other harms. Also you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and openness issue, funds, age dissimilarity, faith background, remorse, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this article I should identify an affair as a long term, maybe weeks long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, date married woman.
Why do men have extramarital affairs? There are as many answers as there are seeking affairs. I suppose mostly though it is just the human state, the need for care, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and appreciated. Here are a few explanations I have run across.
Naturally we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is enjoyable and exciting, and sex makes us escape the world for a short period of time. This ecstasy exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people are able to turn the desire on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the exhilaration of the hunt. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another person, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos society has erected against married dating. For many individuals the yearnings will defeat their fears and make them risk the fury of not only their family, but the public as well. So why, what is the catalyst?
Sex Addicts, maybe some of us are. Sex is horribly pleasant, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of physically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have an affair and not wound your spouse or anybody else? You will need to reduce the risk you are taking. If you have the approach that a good affair is one that is advantageous to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the biggest grouping, colossal actually. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, but they are comfortable in the way they live, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the children to think about. Your money are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay as a family besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that stop them implementing the sex performance, at least not with their othere half. An marital affair from time to time solves the difficulty while keeping the marriage whole.
Neglect, sorrowfully this is a frequent groung I fear. One or the other, usually the husband is sexually neglecting his wife for a tones of reasons. As a male I really am thankful to you guys neglecting your ladies and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “hot wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but evil.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, could be it is a lack of love, maybe caring is disappeared, could be it is the intimacy, could be neglect. Could be we have just developed apart, our ordinary concerns diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is conflicting of what you want. Maybe I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The number one reason people give is, they seek the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for financial gain, for retribution and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.